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Aww man! The duty free allowances for bringing alcohol into Canada suck!

There goes trying to get around the LCBO's 2 to 3x the American price markup/"sin tax". (A bottle of Boone's Farm Sangria was like $6 and change Canadian. This is just wrong. [And any comments about how drinking Boone's Farm is just wrong will be automatically forwarded to /dev/null.])

I don't get it. For being such a liberal place, having a "sin tax" on alcohol doesn't make much sense. I guess America doesn't completely suck.

I had a craving for Jello shooters. (Blame the good RP I had with finmagik.) So I made Jello shooters.

Who wants to come over and get plastered on Jello shooters with me? Please? I'm bored and lonely.

After reading http://www.myscienceproject.org/j-shot.html, all I can say is, man, I *REALLY* want Jello shots tonight. BAD.

/me grumbles about having to stop @ the liquor store and pick up some liquor to make some.

BTW, where do you get the little plastic cups at? Do you have to go to a restaurant supply house or do they sell them at certain liquor stores or grocery stores?

So you partied tonight and you had too much to drink.
SoberRide.
Call 1-800-200-TAXI.

At least in the DC area, they're running until 4 am. And I'm pretty damn sure they're free. They'll get ya home, safe and sound.

'Cause drinking is fun. Driving is fun. But drinking and driving is just STUPID.


Get home safe, everyone, and have a Happy Halloween. :)

Metro is going to be a MESS this weekend.

Went to Dyke Night last night. They were having a pumpkin carving contest. I won 2nd place! I *never* win an award for artsy things like this! I wasn't carving to win, I was carving to have some fun.

Oh, and me + Jello shooters = bad news. They're too easy to do and so I get wayyy too drunk on them. I had to have at least 15 last night. I totally stopped counting after the first couple. Ended up making a royal ass of myself.

Oh well... it happens to the best of us.

But MMMMMMM... Jello Shooters.

And now I gotta go take the bus to Bethesda to the Army/Navy Surplus store to buy myself a backpack frame for actually doing my Doc Ock costume.

Oh, and duct tape. I'll need LOTS of duct tape. :D

Anyone wanna come over when I'm done and help me out with the tentacle construction? (/me looks at asciilifeform and/or devvieish in particular, although anyone who's interested is more than welcome to come)

(oh, and note to self... deposit those checks too)

I wanna go have more. I'm not as drunk as I wanted to be.

However, that would mean having to inflict MORE tequila on myself. And that's just making me go EWW right now.

God, I hate tequila... why can't the shortest path between me and drunk be something that tastes good that I actually ENJOY?

Oh, and I probably should eat something/drink some water.

Remind me again... will doing that keep me from getting as drunk and/or get me drunk for a shorter period of time? Because I don't want that to happen, but I do want to stave off a hangover and/or I'm starving.

(Oh, and yes, I update my LJ FAR too much when I've had some.)

God, I'm *HUNGRY*, man!

Can anyone ELSE here say: "two-all-beef-patties-special-sauce-lettuce-cheese-pickles-onions-on-a-sesame-seed-bun"?

Hungry.

Ok... and then I burped again, and that terrible flavor came in my mouth and I feel like my stomach is damn near on its way to being on fire (feels like a hot coal is smoldering in it) and I feel queasy.

And now it's a battle between hungry and queasy.

Hungry: Big Mac. Those Buffalo Chicken Taquitos from 7-11. Anything bad for me with lots of different tastes (hmm, I seem to be hung up on the buffalo foods concept).

HUNGRY WINS THE ROUND!

(For those of you NOT interested in reading my drunken ramblings, I sincerely apologize. Truly.)

Hmm.

Stages of drunkenness are so interesting.

I seem to have entered the "horney" stage. I'm suddenly physically horney. Like, I can feel/I'm made aware of my clitoris. It's warm and my attention is drawn to it.

I also seem to have some difficulty at this stage typing larger words correctly. Like drunkenness. I keep trying to spell it with 2 Ks.

Tequila.

Yes, I went for the tequila. That's how bad I feel. Was able to drink it w/o having to taste it. Chugged (I think... I hope) quite a bit. Only tasted it at the end when I stopped holding my breath.

Perhaps doing that on an empty stomach was stupid. It sure does taste bad enough being burped up.

But 20 minutes from now, hopefully, I won't be able to feel a thing. I can already feel it kicking in and it's only been about 2 mins (yes, when I haven't eaten anything all day, I metabolize alcohol QUICKLY). Gah, and there goes the headache and burping it up STILL tastes bad.

And I'm shaking from cold. And my back is completely cramped up.

And I'm terrified I'm gonna puke it up. I don't want to do that. If I'm going to do that, please let me be drunk when it happens so I don't remember it.

I'm sorry, it just hurt so bad, I couldn't handle it anymore. Although I think I drank to make it hurt more. I'm not sure.

Things are starting to go fuzzy in my brain already.

Ooh... there goes the starting to feel a little better stage. Hmm.

God, I just wish I wouldn't burp from it. Perhaps I have ulcers or something, but I feel like it's eating a hole through my stomach walls.

Knowing that it's tequila, I wouldn't be surprised if that's exactly what it's doing.

Gah. Did I mention how much I *hate* tequila? It's just the shortest path between me and drunk. But it's so truly vile. I keep it in my freezer so that it's not as bad.

I only drink tequila when I'm *really* depressed and/or I *really* wanna get drunk fast. Yeah, it's like "worst alcoholic like behavior for her? She drinks tequila."

So does Otto, it seems (see icon).

Bored. And lonely.

Gonna go get smashed on Bailey's.

And play EarthBound.

Yum... EarthBound.

Jello shots are still alcohol. It is still imperative that you drink water with them so that you don't have a hangover in the morning.

The pain in my left temple is driving this point on home.

Ow.

Ow.

Ow.

I should have kissed her.

I totally should have kissed her.

Damn it!

Did Jello shots tonight @ the Eagle. They don't get you as plastered, and you can do a hell of alot more of them.

Met a nice woman, a tech writer nonetheless!, named Katherine, who lives near me, who gave me a ride home.

I totally should have kissed her.

She was older (but that didn't bother me), and quite unassuming. She almost looked like the librarian type.

In case she's reading this, I really shouldn't type this, but oh well.


Heh... I'd do her. :-D

But I'd more like to kiss her.



What is it with me when I get drunk, I become a slut for kissing and for sucking and for something in my mouth? What is it with me and being nice and tipsy and wanting to kiss like mad? I've got this total oral fixation thing, I swear.

God, I wanna kiss someone so fucking bad right now, it's not even funny...

oh well...

I'm bleeding from my twat. Finally. w00h00!
However, this means I'm bleeding from my twat. And my emotions are all over the fucking place. So I'm on the warpath. Approach with caution.

(I wanna know what's up with my being a week late 2 months in a row. This is NOT LIKE my body. I'm usually regular down to 3 days [and it's usually late]. It's starting to concern me.)


( Let's see. Last night. [cut because it's LONG, biatch!] )
Hag Sameach to my Jewish friends! Oh, and asciilifeform and devvieish, when are you having your alternative seder? I hope it's tomorrow (or at least not tonight), because I'm thinking of going back to the Crucible tonight.

I'm being a naughty girl and trying to convince trinityva to come and play with me. She has quite the evil imagination... and I'm eating it up like a kitten lapping from a saucer of milk. :-D
She had a rough night last night, so we're probably going to settle on dinner. But since it's Pesach, I have to figure out non-leavened bread dinner (I don't keep actual full kosher on this. I just don't eat leavened breadstuffs). I'm thinking maybe sushi?

Ok... I'll stop babbling now and post this.
/me gives a casual, whole handed salute (think Ock in Spider-Man 2 when he tells Spider-Man "you have a train to catch")

Bourbon Congratulations! You're 130 proof, with specific scores in beer (80) , wine (166), and liquor (69).

Screw all that namby-pamby chick stuff, you're going straight for the bottle and a shot glass! It'll take more than a few shots of Wild Turkey or 99 Bananas before you start seeing pink elephants. You know how to handle your alcohol, and yourself at parties.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 69% on proof You scored higher than 94% on beer index You scored higher than 99% on wine index You scored higher than 90% on liquor index

Link: The Alcohol Knowledge Test written by hoppersplit on Ok Cupid

Wow... that's really scary. That's really REALLY scary. That is, how much better I scored at beer than everyone... especially considering I hate beer. But then again, I was only scoring against the chicks, and chicks usually don't like beer. I've been trying to amass as much knowledge about alcohol as I can the past year or so. Having a specific interest in wine (and having read portions of Wine for Dummies) helped my wine score, and having an office mate whom I drink with that used to be a bartender, that I can ask questions to helped my liquor score (no, I only cheated on 1 question by asking him right now. The others were from memory.)

But, yeah... I rule. Bring it. :D

Ya know, I don't remember getting on my computer last night after I came home from the bar. But my away message was changed to Sleep, so I guess I did.

So I'm computing and I notice there's a big smudge in the middle of my monitor. It looks like it was previously wet.

And then I figure out what it is, and realize that, yes, I did get on the computer after I came home last night.



It's a giant wet kiss mark. From where I gave into my drunken fangirl lust and passionately kissed the picture of Doc Ock I have as my background right now.
http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/15884283/

Yeaaaah. I'm sad.

Oh... my GOD!!!!

Bohemian Rhapsody rocks SO HARD when you're drunk!!!


W0W!!!! w00000w!

You can not believe the depth and the breadth to which I utterly loathe and hate myself. I am repulsed by my very presence on this planet, the very fact that I exist. God, I'm a disgusting sack of flesh. I am a sorry excuse for a human being, which is saying something, considering how brainless and worthless your average person is now a days.

I should have never been born. They should have tested my mother while she was pregnant, found out that she was carrying a horrid repulsion, a freak of nature, and made her/convinced her to abort.

But then again, perhaps my consciousness would have just decided to come back with her next try. Is there any way to actually kill off someone's soul? I don't mean beat it into submission, I mean make it so it doesn't exist. Because that which is the essence of me, that which makes me who I am is simply revolting and loathsome. It doesn't deserve to live. Think extreme deformity.

I am such a FREAK.

I can just feel the minutes slowly tick by and I wait until 5 o clock, until I can get out of here, this soul crushing place, and go home and just be numb. Put myself under... forget about the world. Forget about my boss, my job... forget about how I once had a girl, or should I say, she once had me.

I exercized again last night. When I was done, I felt SO GOOD. I just released so many endorphins... I was in a state of euphoric bliss. I biked for 30 minutes, and then I used a no-impact running machine for 20. I ran yesterday. I never ran in my life. And it felt SOO GOOOOD. At about 6 minutes in, I was already tired but I just made myself keep going... I fell into a cadence, just like when biking. One of those things where you're too tired to go on but you push your body and it goes on out of sheer inertia. If I had stopped at any point, I wouldn't have been able to start again, but if I just kept going, kept going, kept going, my body responded... and it responded well. My body and my brain remember what it was like back when I was in shape in HS, back when I biked all the time, back when I did vigorous folk dancing every Wednesday. It remembers those brain waves, it remembers those patterns. It knows how to respond. It feels so good. I'm glad to know my body isn't letting me down.

The euphoria after working out feel so good... it's like better than the good parts of drinking w/o the bad. The only problem is... the part I'm RPing right now, it's the wrong mood to get into character. The exact wrong mood. And I'm not RPing any characters with the right mood. Grrr.

But now. Now I'm at work. Walking into work, my mind falls into the vapid pit of despondency, my soul gets the life force sucked from it. And all I can think about is drinking, drowning it out, making it all go away. Grabbing a bottle of tequila [I don't even LIKE tequila] and just pouring shot after shot down my gullet, feeling the burn in my belly, knowing that I'm killing brain cells, hoping that consciousness won't return, praying to the Chemical God that work won't exist in the morning or that I won't exist in the morning or that SOMETHING will change.

Today, the minutes pass like hours, the hours pass so slowly, and still the sky is light.

Every minute passes like an eternity. I know there's stuff I need to be doing, but I just can't. It hurts too bad. It's too deadening, the leadening of my soul.

Tick....





Tick....





Tick....





Oh, God, I can hardly wait to get off work, to get home.

There is no rest, no hope for the weary.
***
Oh, and herodotusjr? I don't care. Suck it. (heh... "Suck it, Trebek. Suck it long, and suck it hard.")
***

On another note, Google Whack!
"vapid raisin"

I had the word vapid in my box from looking it up at M-W.com for the above... I wanted to make sure I was using it correctly. so I was like "I wanna find a google whack... what should I put with vapid?" the word raisins came into my mind. I tried it, no hits. Then I tried the singular. Success.

"vapid raisin"
***
Oh, and 10 points and a cookie to the person who can find the 2 lyric references in this post, and say what they're from. They should be pretty obvious.

Gaaaah... headache... dull aching headache.
Gaaaah... hangover.

Still... it could be much, much worse.

I guess I didn't throw up enough of the liquor last night (or my dinner).

Note: New Low! First Time! (heh... First Post!)

Yeah... not as bad as being sick and throwing up, but still not much fun. Luckily I had the lights off and my eyes closed. And I made it to the toilet.

So, uh, yeah. I still don't think I want to repeat that experience. At least not anytime soon.

I need someone to cuddle up to... someone to kiss... someone to love me, and for me to love, even if it's just for a little while. A one night stand would be lovely.
Someone to help take away the pain... someone to help me remember how lovely intimacy and passion can be.

Ugh... hangover. Gaaaah.

I might head on down to Katsucon... probably not though, with the way I'm feeling.

Ok... I'm heading back to bed now. Or maybe I'll read some more of my fanfic.

Ok... so I decided to join the health club near my work. I wanna get in shape, and I wanna get strong and powerful. I'm currently a little too damn round. And completely out of shape.

So I'm sitting biking on the stationary bike, and I'm listening to an MP3 CD on my mini-DVD player. And I'm realizing I have Spider-Man 2 with me. And I'm thinking how much I wanna indulge in some Ockliciousness. So I finish my 20 min session, and I go downstairs and get the DVD.

And then I do a 30 minute session... and I watch the Ock-umentary. :D

Does this make me a serious geek? I think so.

The cooler thing is, an older guy started biking next to me, and I caught him watching it with me a bit! And he was grinning at it!

Doc Ock fan in disguise? Who knows?

***

Been reading fanfic (currently actively reading Freak Like Me [on ch 7, reading parts of it when I can... but it seems I read it late at night, start to get tired, get too tired to read and have to go to bed. Gah! I sound like my mom!], Still need to finish Falling Feels Like Flying and Unreasonable Addiction), RPed some with dA's Lonely-Invisible on Thursday (had a great time doing that), working out at the gym (cycling, swimming, and enjoying the whirlpool, sauna, and steam room.

And, uh, yeah. Trying to deal with the pain. Exchanged notes with Her yesterday (at much peril to herself, having to break promises to people to do it. Bless her heart). She said we can't be in love anymore. I knew that already, just couldn't bring myself to admit it to myself. So having to shift her from a love and friend to just a friend. But a friend amongst fangirls seems to be able to be more cuddly and closer than friends usually. So I don't exactly know how close of friends she wants to be. You know how some friends touch and cuddle and are emotionally and physically intimate, but it's all in a physically affectionate way, but not in a passionate sexual way? Yeah. I wonder if she wants that, can do that. I wonder if I want that, would actually be able to do that. I wonder...

But I haven't touched a drop of liquor the past 2 nights. Which is good. Because I was getting shit-faced to kill the pain there for about 5 nights out of 7 the past week. I have nothing against drinking. Whatsoever. And I want to, am going to be able to drink casually when I choose to, and drink hard when I choose to. That's the thing. I actually can control and choose to drink how I want to. I am in control of it right now... I just don't want it to get to a point where I'm not in control of it.

Keep meaning to write some more fanfic/work on existing ones, but by the time I get home and am able to sit and devote time to it, I'm usually too burnt out to write. But the ideas keep popping up in my head... sometimes I catch myself working on the blocking for this one piece walking to the Metro in the morning.

Drew some more. Need to post it. Wrote some freewriting in my sketch book... need to scan it in and post it but am not exactly sure how to go about that, because the way that the Writing sections in dA work, it's supposed to be typed in, not scanned.

If I throw myself into exercise to try to kill the pain, it will have the very beneficial side benefit of losing weight and getting in shape. Let's just hope I won't turn it into a life long habit that will become detrimental to me.

Just trying to deal with what life throws my way at this point. Trying to find some happiness.

Now I *really* need to get back to work.

I have to get going for work.

I REALLY *DON'T* want to get going for work.

I'm really starting to hate my life.

It seems to be an endless cycle: wake up, get dressed, go to work, get off of work, get drunk, collapse on my bed.

Then I get to do it all over again.

I think my favorite part is collapsing on my bed.

I wish I could be drunk at work and sober when I'm off. But the work deadens me so inside, it damages and kills me inside so much, that by the time I get off of work, I need to drink to drown out the pain. Because it took the pain I already had and multiplied it by about 1000%.

***

In other news, I really freaking hate my boss. If I've told him once I've told him a thousand times about how I'm having problems doing my work. But, no, he thinks...

Grrr... I'm just too damn enraged to talk about it.

The fucker.

I really DON'T want to talk about it, so don't ask.

***

God damn it... once again... I forgot to charge my MP3 player. Fuckity fuck fuck. I just want to listen to some hard shit to get my rage out, but no.

Bailey's & Butterschnapps just can't get me/keep me drunk enough.
I need harder shit... I need to get myself some flavored vodka. Vodka seems to be strong enough, straight.

Brad/herodotusjr? Yes, I know you're freaking out right now. You want the truth? I don't care. You go through what I have with her, you live with the anguish and pain I do every day, and you'll understand. This is only a temporary thing, I'm sure. But sometimes you just need to escape the incredible shittyness that is reality on a more regular basis. And this seems to be the way to do it.

***

That being said, I *LOVE* the music from EarthBound.

As I couldn't find anyone to hold, I held the bottle instead. It's kinda sad really.

Talked to a guy who was kinda cute, but was boring as hell.

***

So her boyfriend comes online, says he wants to let me know what's going on in the house, and alludes to loving more than one person. I think he knows she loves me and I love her, and he's ok with that. I can't believe he's helping me out. He thinks she's his for life though... meh. She owns her own body and soul.

But, still, he's helping! w00t!

***

They're going to try to get their own apartment on their own. I'm so proud of her and them for that. Seriously.

I just felt like telling that to you all.

I really have to pee. heh;.

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]
oh, and I really wanna say this too...

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typing while drunkis FUN!!!


/em wants ot bang the keyboard and wants words to come out. they don't
damn it

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:-D